5 Key Life Lessons My Adult Students Taught Me

What lessons have you been taught by your students?

I recently led a 4-week workshop on writing micro- (<100 words) fiction to a group of adult learners in my community. The experience, with all its ups and downs, reminded me that the best teachers I’ve had are ALWAYS actively learning from their students. With that in mind, I tried to keep my mind and heart open and humble to the wisdom that was sure to come my way, and I was duly rewarded.

Here are 5 key life lessons my adult students taught me while I was busy teaching them.

Life Lesson #1: One person’s sharing could be another’s trigger.

Aside from one friend who’d registered for the class, every student was an unknown quantity, a name on a spreadsheet. Even when we “met” on Zoom that first evening, I still only knew what each openly shared. And that wasn’t a lot.

Writing (at least GOOD writing) often claws at our most intense, most intimate emotions. Everyone brings a unique set of experiences into the room. Triumphs, traumas, and the minutiae of daily living. You never know what an “innocuous” prompt might unleash. And that goes for the writer as well as the receivers of story.

One woman felt very comfortable writing about domestic violence in a manner that felt quite realistic. Another had a very hard time hearing those stories. Both needed to be respected and heard.

Life Lesson #2: Technology is both helpful and challenging.

Zoom is great. No matter my location, weather, or traffic, the 9 of us could easily convene online. But from the moment I agreed to teach the class, I worried my internet connection would give me trouble. I’d had a few bizarro issues in the weeks leading up to the first class. It’s one thing to glitch when you’re taking a class, quite another when you’re teaching!

I had an ipad and phone backup plan, which I luckily never needed.

Another potential issue with Zoom is the lack of connection among the participants. When you can’t see each other, social cues are even harder for those who are already challenged. The lack of syncronicity sometimes causes people to talk at once, which can be awkward too.

I also had my Powerpoint “deck” in place, complete with graphics and the occasional photo. Still, my screen sharing wasn’t perfect. I often accidentally scrolled forward or back, causing confusion and giving away my secrets before their time!

As the classes went on, I became better at both the technical aspects and at keeping my WiFi anxiety at bay.

Life Lesson #3: Classes are like kids’ birthday parties.

I once hosted a very elaborate pirate and princess treasure hunt birthday party for two dozen 6-year-olds. The details that had taken me a week to create – “buried” jewels, treasure maps burnt around the edges, rhyming clues to solve – took the kids all of fifteen minutes to plow through. After which followed an hour of unplanned time before cake. It wasn’t pretty. There were swords.

Since that day, I have always planned for more activities than I thought I’d need. Same goes for teaching materials. You want your materials and the class time to come out even. Just like ice cream and cake.

Part of the challenge turned out to be me sabotaging myself! I’d planned a bunch of writing exercises for 7-10 minutes, but as soon as I gave the prompts, I was impatient to hear their creations. I’m not sure I ever made it past the 5-minute mark.

If you’re looking for a great site for writing prompts, start here.

Life Lesson #4: Starting with kindness is not always apparent.

For some strange reason, there are people who believe that speaking critically makes them appear clever. You can see this readily in the world of book reviews. If you have a stronger stomach than I, take a look at a couple of the less-than-stellar reviews of First Quiver (Cupid’s Fall #1) over on Goodreads.

Though I assumed that the participants in my class had only good intentions, I did find it worthwhile to repeat “Kindness first,” – and hold us all to that standard.

Chances are, in a roomful of novice writers, no critical comment will be impactful enough to risk hurt feelings. And my personal feeling is anyone who DOES have such an important, clever comment to share can find a nice way to say it.

This is not to undervalue the enormous benefit of great critique! Here are a few of my feelings on that topic…

Life Lesson #5: I’ve actually learned a lot about writing.

Well, here was a pleasant discovery! Organizing my thoughts on writing allowed me to realize I have actually gained quite a bit of knowledge through my years of practice and contest writing. And happily, the folks who joined my class tended to agree. I could tell not only from that lovely glow of understanding, but also by the way they were incorporating some of those best practices into their writing samples. I was proud of them!

I can only hope that the wisdom I imparted measures up with the life lessons my adult students taught me.

Thanks for reading!

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